Mr. Kicky Pants

I've been feeling overwhelmingly lately that I'm preggers with a BOY! Which, if you know me, is the exact opposite of what I've been saying it is the whole time. There's just something that keeps screaming BOY to me, even though everyone and their mother insists it's a girl, given what I've been going through.

The latest in my joyous ride of being knocked up is a three-letter word that you pray doesn't ever happen when you're outside the confinement of your home: G-A-S. Let me just tell ya bout my Friday night.

My husband was out of town on a boy's weekend, so I invited my girlfriends over for dinner. Only on the way home, I was struck by the Gas Devil--only problem is that there was no actual air coming out, so it just kept building and building on top of the huge stomach I've already managed to grow. Laugh all you want, you fools! But trust me, there is no gas pain like pregnancy gas pain. My friend Amanda even tried moving my legs the way you do for an infant who's constipated (see photo)! But honestly, it was the GasX that did the trick.

After the pain just just about to go away, I noticed a dog barking outside behind the house and realized hey that's my dog. Sure enough, it was my Jack Russell Oliver being viciously attacked by two raccoons the size of Chuy Bravo (shame on you if you don't know who he is). We all screamed bloody murder for about 5 minutes straight. But when NO neighbors offered to help, we were forced to go in a break up the fight ourselves. All credit is due to Amanda, who bravely yanked Ollie out of the grasp of the fatter coon.

Needless to say, 4 hours of intense gas pain and screaming uncontrollably can't be the best for your fetus, and all I could do was rub my belly and keep apologizing. And I think Mr. Kicky Pants appreciated it, because I felt my first little kick right after. He's given me a few more since too, like after I ate a massive bowl of bean chili, and then yesterday when I finally laid down in bed after hours of shopping. See? Told ya it's a boy!

One week to go til we have confirmation, and I cannot wait! Til then! May the Gas Devil never bear his ugly soul on you....